-21st-

21st, a stride of my life.

key to unlock the door of next checkpoint.
somebody ask me, what crazy things u have done for past 21 yrs?
erm..those were not really crazy...
but,heaps of crazier things awaits me to be created.

she's the one blowing candle at the same day with me.lasting 311.

she and she are the alway buddies.

and, she's just too important to me.

-cny eve-

chinese new yearrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!
a day before returning i never sleep just for completing my final board,the most reluctant works ever.
im not excellent in drawing board,fuck.
meet u,the most 'thirsting' matter.
it's still an uncertainty for you.
it seems close,yet distant. ya,distant.
u've too much of apprehension or...misgiving.
for you,that's sentiment.
as what you are, as what you think,
as yourself.
2moro muar,then langkawi.
relaxing myself on beach, beach, beach!!!

-5 days-

5 days of holidays,
being occupied by her, met her nearly every day here,
pityingly she sick since few days ago,
first day,first meeting after a month.hope you like my silly action and herbal tea.
sec day,first lunch after a month.totally ignore the nice pizza,it's really a good restaurant,macoporlo kitchen.
was worrying about her leg,hopefully getting well soon.
third day, first time i try the strange bean,haha,you're cute when biting it. first time,you feel it.
forth day, tiramisu night, freaking greentea tiramisu, candles.
a real man respects his girl and protects her.
fifth day, eyes on you, every single second, i'll never forget what you've told me. and thanks for our photos.
2 weeks after today,would it still last,i wonder.

you're lovely.

-10-

few days after,
sitting on sofa,blogging in a my dark living room,
it's kinda....romantic==
these few days,
a stupid presentation drawing,i just gt 3 out of 10,it spoils my mood exactly.
im afraid i cnt get the tuition fee discount,for me,i just wanna use it for travelling,arhhh
archi.history will be having a trip to sarawak probably.
always struggling on design, last project of this sem,a portable,movable shelter,to fill in a person.
have to waste so much money again to buy all materials, and lastly the most important part, presentation board. judges were just simply taking a look on it or even terribly they dont bother about how's your design and keep censuring you and your board,'what kind of board is this?' ...
life is always not under our expectation.

Enjoying chating with somebody until 1.30.
and, ya,a lovely webcam tonight. haha.
when someone put so much of cares on the thing you gave her,even it's small,and she carries it every day and night.how's your feeling. great,and....getting deeper,haha.
llife is always touched by someone  ,hopefully you're touched by me tooooo.

night.
friday again.

-4th-

my china friend aka ex-roommate,i didnt expect he can do any good favor to me since he likes smoking,carlsberg,online game every day though i've been here for 2 months,BUT,thankful to his consideration like giving me fine wardrobe,bottom bed,automatically switch off light and sound when i sleep,talking with me in good manner,dint angry of me closing and open door frequently every morning and night,haha,use his washing machine,changing light tube,and lastly he left his speaker here,haha,too heavy for him to bring back to china,so,yea,im lucky i think, he is GONGJUN. surely i will visit him not now.
the starting 4 days of 2013, did i manage to think and handle everything in brand new 2013 and 21st ' ways?
did i plan and decide as well as determine something rationally or depending mood like the pasts?
im still wondering ...im still working myself up..and im still learning and doing..
2011 to 2012,the word 'change' always be kept in my stubborn and ego mind until 2013.keep it on.i think one day i will truely and definitely realize the true meaning of 'change'.
201314,have you told ur beloved? i havent. it's not a suitable numbering i should say. there's still a bridge.Passing it ,time's needed.
First futsal game in 2013 just now,freaking qio.
you know,everybody pursue his/her dream using their own ways.I used to think of all kind of stupid things to fulfill my 'what should i do in the year' list. I was just too young when thinking all of them,but im just too old when i think that all those are childish and wont be happened in such a shameful ways. wtf,im still young, aint i??? so,apologize to those who're ridiculed by me that always doing childish matter,u have your own thoughts. I used to not be a person who like to judge others,didnt i? so,still the same,live for yourself,live your life,but not to be selfish,sometimes,i think occasional selfishness is still with me.trying to throw it out.
Midnight blogging are always irrational and emotional and unacceptable.
awaiting Les Miserable tomorrow, my anne hathaway.
and somehow i think that....1 month and 5 days of waiting is just too long. i cnt wait. u know,time's always the key factor of everything's changes.ya,TIME!!!
let nature takes its course? this's always the way i can be so optimistic in my life,yet, initiative is indispensable.
yea,goodnight,
im enjoyed in blogging under a desk lamp,blowing in of wind from windows in front of my desk,light off (off  automatically,electrical problem ==) if fortunately i cn stay here for 3 yrs, life's indeed great.

-2013前夕-

2012之照~
帮我拍这张照的人很了不起~

年头说到年尾
成功当上国光的临教，教早上班，5K
我爱教，爱说话，爱和学生沟通，
可是我其实不是适合老师的生活的人，我不喜欢在学校的感觉
半年的'教书生涯'其实过得不是普通的快。真的。
每天来回，吃饭，webcam，睡觉，就酱。
我不善于和学校里的老师沟通是真的。
2月去泰国bangkok。
3月成绩出,我没有人家喜悦和悲伤,我还感到侥幸,我很像没有其他人努力.
drumset和画画，谢谢两位老师。
4月，下午班，2J , 教的时候很无奈和生气,回想起却非常有趣。
你们都很可爱，老师说对不起呀如果有打骂你们。
教书教到6月结束。
6月再去槟城，我相信那是我一辈子都不会忘记的曾经。很快乐。对吧？
当了半年的老师，后几个月还是老师。补习老师。
家教，补习中心，教琴。我不会忘记那班创价的学生。
我在那里教得很开心，1年的时间，你们很棒。
7月大学出,我中ump,environmental tech,不是我想要的读来干嘛。
我从小就要读archi,可是别人从小由如此的志愿,就会很拼命的努力.
我没有。
8月,和jun两个人10天背包sabah，大自然的魅力，要考潜水执照。嗯快了。
旅行永远都是人生奋斗的目标
嗯，持续了两三年，结束了，是我的错。
9月，每个人进本地大学了，我呢，还在教书，赚的钱呢？我也不懂。。
10月，张副校长，感谢你，在国光，很清醒有她
月尾，开始上课。我读我爱的东西。没有人懂我读的学校是哪间，
可是我懂这里的archi其实不简单。不好小看。不输人。
学校upgrade成uni，我觉得我很幸运。
每天都在画~功课其实刚刚好,就是last minute才有动力.哈。
12月,演奏会，赶上赶下不后悔。一份挂念，我心里有数。
是那种感觉，没错。
对的人还是错的人呢  感觉性格兴趣相处很对 哪里错
执着下去，失败也值得。
我一直相信只要是真心地为人付出，叫舍得，不亏欠自己。
继续加油吧。
31号，一直画一直画，
电话一起倒数，呵呵。
我说我会加油，只怕你一口拒绝。
明天新一天，新一年！

21岁不简单！

so long i've never been so whole-heartedly preparing something for anybody,until i meet you.
Seriously.
But, sigh.
do i need to continue?
im always not a smart person in love.

while doing a lot of course works in these busy days,
after a rush concert, go and back very quickly,
albeit i wish i could go back again soon,
there's no more spare time ,
it's now onward only passions happening in my days,
not only my academic,you're my passion as well.
such a long-lost feeling, don't miss it, i tell myself.

-Animal-

Animal in lines and geometric.
assignment of architecture communication.

-Bird's View-

the first assignment i've done in my first semester in studio design.
you may be saying that all these lines aren't related to architecture and building.
But what i can say is,they are closely linked with buildings,due to the all sorts of geometric patterns,all the buildings are in geometrical shape.
The title of this drawing is,bird's view.
By using your own imagination thinking that you're a bird or can be even an eagle,looking downward,upper apex of all the building and structure can be seen through your(bird's)eyes.
There are communication tower,round building like colloseum,factories,mountains,residential area with chimneys,vineyard,paddy field,oil palms plantation,highway with roundabout and different street light and rivers.
The five principles i used for this work,radial,centralized,repeatation,symmetry and axis.

-Lines-

Lines,the basic,
ain't easy and simple as what i've seen,
it's forsooth hard and dizzling when asked to draw without dirt neatly,
different kind of lines,
different thickness of lines,
must be uniform,
the first assignment,lines nt more than 2mm of distances,
once erased,there'll be a mark,no choice,redraw and redraw.
i admit i'm a patient guy,
going through these works,my patience has indeed been multiplied.
you know,
i enjoy it,
enjoy making myself doing things concentratedly (is this adverbs correct?)
how great and glad i can focus on something without any distracting thoughts(positive pls)
Being single,
isn't a bad thing.
not consolation,yet Truth.

-* *-

这是想念还是舍不得还是害怕
想念在这里许许多多的美好时光
舍不得对我好的每一个人,我的第一第二个家的家人,我的朋友们
害怕，我什么都不怕，我可以一个人到多远的地方都行
就是害怕回不来，几年后的自己回不来几年前的现在，
傻了是吗，我去kl，不是去巴西，不过我也想3年后的另外两年是在国外完成的
人的想法不是说不会变就不会变的，
请求大家，如果我真的变了，给我一把掌，告诉我，我每个礼拜天还是要去练习，还是要继续在我的第二个家玩音乐，告诉我，我得留多多时间给家人，告诉我这个时候的我是怎样想的，不过我觉得我不会变。
我害怕岁月的流逝，我害怕看见比我大的人渐渐老去，我更害怕病魔来侵袭我身边的每个人
生日最常用的祝语，祝你身体健康，这句话很普通但很珍贵。
我害怕我爸爸累到坏了自己的身子，每每去店帮忙，我都好心痛，掌柜谁说很简单，你信不信他可以掌到没时间大小便。
我害怕妈妈没人陪，虽说她真的很多活动，多姿多彩，不过最近开始下午要顾店，也累了，账簿的事对她这个最厉害唠叨的人完全是一窍不通。
我害怕改变，我是个老古板，我爱念旧，我讨厌新东西真的。这世界一直在更新，我不喜欢。
旧的不去，新的不来，这样子说不对，我跟爱
旧的不去，新的再来，才对。
人很容易一不小心就忽略掉一些其实在身边很重要的人事物
说得对,我很不认真，也不够细心，我不想再忽略了大家。
请让我更坚定，请让我成为更踏实和认真的人。
The man who can't be moved.

-念海-

刚刚游完泳，真的让我很怀念在mabul大海中央脱掉救生衣赤手空拳往下游的美好时光(其实是超恐怖和无助的),在海里被阳光照射的感觉无敌美妙.
希望下一次和大海接触不是穿着救生衣，而是潜水装和氧气筒。
明年三月让我潜个够！

-婆罗洲-Sea Gypsy-

Sea Gypsy,华文称为海上原住民
这个族群可分为很多种,有Moken(东南亚),Orang Laut(印尼),Tanka People(中国南部),Urak Lawoi(泰国),而生活在东马,也就是我在mabul看见的叫做Bajau.
其实这些游牧民族也没有指定的居住地方,因为他们能居住在马来西亚,印尼和菲律宾的海域.
所以拥有一艘船,他们能到其他两个国家的海域去.
他们是不持有任何国家的身份证的.
Bajau,也成为Sama. Bajau是大多数生活在海域的,而Sama则是生活在土地上的。
据说,这几十年很多的菲律宾Bajau因为国家教育制度和工作制度,导致他们很多都迁移来到东马,他们同时也有很多到了印尼的kalimantan和sulawesi海域去生活.
当看见他们第一眼,会觉得他们是普通的kadazan人,当是语言完全不同.他们有他们自己的语言.
会发现,很多小孩的头发都是金黄色的,
我以为是他们都码头买染发的自己染,其实不是,那是天生的.
巧克力色皮肤配上金黄色头发的确有恶到.呵呵.

第二天当我走进他们居住的地方时,里面还有居民自己开店卖些蔬果和零食汽水等.
卖给那里的居民呢~还是像我酱走进去看看的游客~在那兜了几圈,基本上是没有生意的.
几个小孩在玩丢汽水罐,追来追去.
小孩们经过看见我们这些游客都会很热情地halo~很友善~
那里并没有学校，孩子们就每天在海边玩,捡东西,玩水,捉鱼..
一个没有教育,没有知识,没有常识,没有报纸,没有新闻的地方,
每天就是过一天算一天,算到老,算到死..
这些住在岛上的小孩,
没能像我们一样能追求自己想要的东西,未来,
难道理由就是因为他们一生下来就是这样,没有办法的吗~
难道他们没有自己的想法,想出去闯出自己的一片天吗~
很可惜,我没有问问看他们的想法
还有他们去世后的遗体,埋在岛上吗,还是海里~
很多东西等我下一次到访才探索清楚,

就下一次吧,还有很多再次到访的理由...

 

 

 

我真的

很庆幸,

我是个能追求自己梦想的少年.

-婆罗洲-Mabul island-

Semporna,
沙巴州的南部,在斗湖之上,从山打根需要接近5小时的车程.
这只是一个靠近码头的小镇,说是小镇,不过都是挺新的双层店屋。
这一处能见到更多的外国游客,大家都是冲着潜水而来的
整个小镇里,除了我们,就再找不到其他的本地华人了
这里人口很密集,很多,但,银行业只有仅仅的两间！
bsn的提款机的钱被提完了,只剩maybank!要排个半小时才能提到款.
当地人应该都还蛮耐心的吧..
这里是通往三大岛屿sipadan,mabul,kapalai的出发点,
很可惜,sipadan每天只限制120游客进入,自从前几年的绑架案后,没人允许在那过夜.
不过其实也没有想去,三个岛最美的,当然是要留给我未来伴侣..跟个男的去,浪费。。
Mabul island,并不是想像中有很大的海滩,很多人,很多渡假屋
反而,只有在岛旁边的uncle chang独家屋,在岛上的scuba junkie，其余的地方,
都是有人住的家。谁的家呢, Sea Gypsy.

在这里,除了清澈见底的大海,还有那碧蓝且不受污染的天空,西北3D的云朵~
在这里,能随时随地就跳下水,可能还对皮肤有益~
在这里,除了鱼,还看见正在游的海龟~
在这里,被晒得全身脱皮我都甘愿~
在这里,看到大家都潜水,只有我们浮浅,觉得超逊.
在这里,我感觉自己不是马来西亚人,而是外国游客.
在这里,我感觉自己也不是游客,而是渡假屋的一份子.
在这里,认识很多人,旅游不只是看世界,也是看看这世界上各种各样的..人.

2013,
我要我自己去任何一个岛的目的就是
潜水.